The Spark

Truth be told: this is one of the scariest projects I have ever started. I'm opening myself up to judgement, encouragement, laughter, life, and possibly more attention than I could ever want. I think it is important for me, and I would be thrilled if my story, my journey, inspires even just one other person. You see, I have been a fat girl for as long as I can remember. Even though I have not been officially diagnosed, my doctor and I are both sure that I have PCOS. This makes losing weight much more difficult for me than for an average person. I wish I had known about this disorder when I was younger, but that is in the past. I can only go forward. I have let my body define who I am for over 2 decades, and it is time, beyond time, for a change.

I have tried to lose weight in the past, and I would do well for a while. Something would always happen to derail me, though. I wasn't eating enough calories to make it through my days, so I would have no energy. I would end up splurging and killing any progress I made. I had a gym membership for awhile. I went 5 to 6 times a week until I sprained my ankle in a game of Ultimate Frisbee (now my most hated sport). The holidays would sneak up, and I would excuse myself for overeating. I was doing quite well a year ago. I had just gotten my dog, and I wasn't letting anything get in the way of my walking. I was determined, but I got over ambitious. My doctor told me that I was unrealistic in my goals. It hurt me, and it damaged my determination a great deal. I let myself stop caring. Something changed for me at the beginning of this year, though. I was inspired by someone else who had lost a lot of weight in just a year's time. By March, I was ready to commit to changing my life.

March 5th, I started tracking my walking, my calories and my weight. It wasn't consistent at first, but it started me on the right path. I pushed myself because I was challenged by the person who was inspiring me. It was a good challenge, though. I was reminded that my weight, my body, is something I can change if I really want it. That was THE moment: The Spark I needed. I searched my mind and heart and found I really wanted it. I owe it to myself to take care of me and to be happy with who I am.

I cut down my calorie intake. I started walking almost daily, and I found ways to motivate and inspire myself. I set obtainable goals for myself, and I'm seeing the progress. There are several things that have helped me, and I will talk about those in future blogs. I just want to say that it is an awesome feeling knowing that I have lost over 20 pounds since March 5th. I have lost over 40 since January 2013, and I'm going to keep going. This was my long winded way of introducing myself and my new blog. The next one will be full of some good information, my opinions on what's out there and what works, and maybe some inspiration and encouragement. I hope to update this blog at least weekly, and maybe someone will find hope and determination again.